A complete guide to toasting and toasting protocol for all occasions with hundreds of jokes, anecdotes and quotations.


Nothing so frightens a man as the announcement that he is expected to respond to a toast on some appallingly nearby occasion.

All ideas he may ever have had on the subject melt away and like a drowning man he clutches furiously at the nearest solid object.

This book is intended for such rescue purpose.

Let the frightened toaster turn first to the key word of his topic in this dictionary alphabet of selections and by chance he may find toast, story, definition or verse that may introduce his remarks.

Then as he proceeds to outline his talk and to put it into sentences, he may find under one of the many subject headings a bit which will happily drive home the ideas he is unfolding.

While the larger part of the contents is humorous, there are inserted many quotations of a serious nature which may serve as appropriate literary ballast.

The jokes and quotes gathered for the toaster have been placed under the subject headings where it seemed that they might be most useful, even at the risk of the joke turning on the compilers.

The Toaster's Handbook contains dozens upon dozens of jokes, quips, anecdotes and quotations to equip you with enough ideas to properly respond to a toast in any occasion.
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